it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
