is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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