Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
