Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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