dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Still dying that you shit outside
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
