ugly people sure do ruin things
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
