what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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