Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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