Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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