Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
