My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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