trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
