how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Acid is not a monday night drug
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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