he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize