I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'm getting married
To pizza
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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