oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Randomize
