Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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