I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
