I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
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