she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize