guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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