Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
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He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
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When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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