He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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