so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
