I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
