You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize