i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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