Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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