oh god the rape fog is back!
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
