Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
