Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
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