The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize