pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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