3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
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Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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