you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
