Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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