Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
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