Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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