Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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