My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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