He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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