are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
