I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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