Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Randomize
