Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
She's the barista slut.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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