This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
