Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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