Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
