I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
