Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
